Crazy Coupon Lady

Extreme Couponing on TLC is the best show ever! These people are insane!!!! So, i'm watching it the other day and these people are saving like thousands upon thousands of dollars every time they shop! One woman's total bill before her store card and coupons was over $1500, after discounts, $6.52! How crazy is that!?! Now let's not forget the fact that her home is a grocery store in and of itself but c'mon people, that's insane savings! So why can't I do that? Why can't I go to the market and buy a ton of stuff and only pay $6? Well, i'm gonna try damnit! So here I go...

I got all my coupons together this past Sunday, all clipped nicey nice, organized just so and broke out the circulars. I stuck with Shoprite, Stop and Shop and Price Chopper but as it turns out Price Chopper has the least quality deals out of all of them. After scanning for the best deals and comparing them to the coupons I have it turns out Shoprite is the store of choice for this shopping trip. So here's how it went down...

I managed to get;

2 tubs of mayo (Kraft, not Hellmans :( )

8 pints of International Delight Coffee Creamers (They have a great shelf life, and hey, I drink alot of coffee)

4 Bottles of Loreal Colorvive Shampoo and Conditioner

1 tub of Matzoh Meal (it's Passover people, gotta make some Matzoh Balls)

After my store card and coupons I only spent $17.17, saving over $37! Not too shabby if I do say so myself. Now it's not a $1000 savings like they show on tv but it's ok, i'm just starting this new obsession. Now, I know, you're thinking 'What the heck do you need 8 creamers for? 2 tubs of Mayo?..." But if you use the stuff, which I do, and it will hold on the shelf, which it will (the creamers for example are good until September) then why not I say!?! It takes some time, and it's kind of a pain in the ass but there is definitely something to be said for the art of couponing. So, I leave you now to go wash my hair, drink some coffee and make some Matzoh Balls... Hope you all can find couponing as successful as I have!

Come live in my World

I live in a world where I am forced to kiss ass for a living. It's ok, I don't mind it. As a matter of fact, i'm pretty good at it. This world has a name, it's called customer service. There are many people who live in my world. People of all shapes and sizes, colors, gender and nationalities. Some of us co-exist better than others, some of us find the world to be to much to handle and run for the hills. It's a tough tough world I tell ya. People come to visit and they don't understand the rules. They believe that they can just waltz into our world, push us around and treat us poorly without any consequence. Sometimes, we let them, it isn't worth the battle, but other times we have to put our war gear on and fight the fight. As someone who peacefully co-exists in this world, I find it frustrating when my neighbors don't understand or follow the rules if this land.

Rule #1 - Treat me with kindness and it will be returned

Rule #2 - I am giving you my money, that can go away if you don't follow Rule #1

Rule #3 - Even if you can't, for whatever reason, solve my problem still follow Rule #1

Simple right? You would think so anyway. I try to follow the rules, play by the book so to speak, so you can understand my frustration when I have to deal with others in my world who don't. Not only do they aggravate me when I have an issue that needs to be fixed but they make the rest of us look bad and make it so that people don't want to visit our happy little land. I don't have the answers, I can't fix the world, all I can do is tend to my garden, fix up my place and know that as long as I love my world, I will be successful.

Mo Money, MoProblems

I wish money wasn't so important. I wish it didn't define who we are and the things that we do in our life. So many decisions in our lives are based on money and all it does it keep us unhappy. We can't do the things that we want, the things that we are passionate about because they either cost too much money or keep us from making the money that we need to survive. Raise your hand if you would still be at your job, or school if money were not an issue. I'm willing to bet that just about no one raised their hands. I know I didn't. So what's the solution? No really, what is it? I don't want to be a part of this rat race anymore. It's exhausting! Do I quit my job and go live in a commune in Iowa, growing crops? Singing kumbaya? I'm pretty sure that's not going to work for me. Do I keep plugging away, continuing to run the race, chasing after the money that will still, not make me happy? I need answers people! Someone reading this has to have some wise words to impart. I'll even throw in a quarter to the wisest!

My dearest Cupid...

An Ode to Cupid...

Excuse me Cupid,

Let's have a word.

You see, my day has been absurd.

It started out all nice and mellow,

but not for long you silly fellow!

In came one with cherry cheesecake

they were so good they made my knees quake!

Another came with yummy pinwheels

so delicious, delighted squeals.

My treat to all, brownies galore

flavor so good, made you want more!

The desserts kept coming throughout the day

I knew that later, I would pay.

The sugar high has come and gone,

and I've spent my night in one big yawn.

My stomach's churning all about

and it's all your fault, without a doubt!

So Cupid dear, please listen close

you keep your arrows and your bows.

You're nice enough, but your purpose is unclear

for EVERYDAY my love ones I hold dear.

So for those of you who enjoy this day

I hope you celebrate in the very best way.

Just please remember that no matter what,

you should love everyday no ifs, ands or buts!

Close encounters of the German Shephard kind

As serious as life can be sometimes, we've all had moments in our life that we can look back on and get a good chuckle out of. I have many such moments, most of them were humorous at my expense. I do, however, have one moment that I can always count on to make me smile and since everybody deserves a good smile, I'm going to share it with you whether you like it or not.

If you know me at all, you know I have a dog named Monkey. He's the sweetest thing and of course, I love him to pieces. I work long hours though and the guilt of leaving him home alone for such long stretches got to me and so I have a dog walker who comes in to, well, walk him. She is a nice older woman, probably in her late 50's to early 60's and she has been taking care of Monkey since I got him. Unfortunately, she happens to be a tad bit scatterbrained. Some days she comes at the wrong time, sometimes she even comes on the wrong day. It's not usually a problem but out of this scatterbrained-ness (I know it's not a word!) comes one of the funniest memories I have.

Monkey has a best friend, her name is Callie. She was his very first friend and Callie's owner/mother and I are also very good friends. Monkey is a small shih-tzu and Callie is a not so small German Shephard. Strange combination but best friends they are. We were having a play date one day, only Monkey was at the groomers getting his hair did. When he was done, we left to pick him up, leaving Callie at the house. On our way to the groomers I get a very panicked phone call from my dog walker.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Joy? It's ___________ " (i'll leave names out to protect the innocent)

"Hi ___________. How are you?"

"Well," and I can hear the panic in her voice "I'm at the house, and there is a very big German Shephard here and no Monkey." Now I can only imagine what could have been running through her head at this point.

"Oh," i'm cracking up at this point "you weren't supposed to be at the house today. It's tomorrow that I need you. Monkey is at the groomers. That is his friend Callie. She is very sweet, she won't bite or anything"

"I'm sure she is very sweet but she won't let me leave! She is standing in front of the front door and won't budge"

So here is this poor woman, expecting my little 15 pound guy, walking into my house and being completely surprised by a not so little German Shephard! Not only that, but the not so little German Shephard is guarding the door and won't let her leave. I think I would have been just as panicked as this poor woman but instead, I was barely able to control the hysterical laughter that was fighting to come out as I pictured what was going on in the house in my head. She finally managed to escape by throwing a treat away from the door and all ended well. You would think this close encounter with the Shephard kind would have taught this woman to be a little less scatterbrained, but alas, it hasn't. Maybe next time I will have to find a Great Dane!

Outta Control

Control is a funny thing. There isn't much we have control over in life. We can control ourselves as far as the things we say, the things we wear, how we look, we can control the choices that we make, like what college we will go to, what job we will take, what color we will paint our house... Aside from that, thinking we have control over anything is laughable.

So, laughable is where I am in my life right now. It seems that the universe has seized control of my life and is having a very good chuckle at my expense. So far, I have fallen down stairs while trying to move a tv, put a pretty decent size hole in my wall due to the fall, fallen down yet again on my front steps on the ice and hurting myself just a teeny tiny bit, and now, I have water finding it's way into my house and destroying my kitchen wall and it's beautiful paint job! I feel like I have to tiptoe around because i'm not sure when the universe is going to drop a piano on my head! The two falls were bad enough but this water situation has really wrecked my life this past week. I have cried, I have screamed, I have done everything but literally beat my head into a wall and at the end of the day, I HAVE NO CONTROL!!! I can't control my management company that refuses to address the problem, I can't control the water coming in through my walls, I can't control the money that I have to put out year after year due to this water issue, and accepting that I have no control over all this has not been, and still is not easy for me.

So, at the end of the day, what's girl to do? I can't fight the powers that be, I can't change the fact that I have no control, so do I just shrug my shoulders and let the universe continue to laugh at my expense? Someone out there has to have some sage advice... Someone has to know how to take back control... For heaven's sake! Help a girl out!

Give me back my brain! Please?

The brain is a funny thing. You have no control over what it does. You may think you do, it lulls you into a false sense of security that way, but just when you think you have it under control, it takes over and BAM! You're life is not it's own anymore. It's like the old Epcot show Cranium Command (for those of you who remember it) where there is a troop of "brain soldiers" charged with the efficient running of the brain. Well that troop doesn't always follow orders, sometimes they take matters into their own hands and like to have a little fun at my expense (or yours for that matter).

Here is how my brain soldiers are ruining my life right now. Insomnia. I don't want it, don't want to even hear the word but yet, the brain soldiers have decided that now is the right time to torment me with this. I'm tired, I can feel it. My eyes are heavy, I have dark circles and I have no motivation to accomplish anything, but yet, the brain soldiers have taken over and here I sit having had no more than a wink of sleep last night and ready to pull my hair out. I get all nice and comfy in my bed, turn off the tv, turn off the light and wait. Still waiting... And, still waiting, but nothing! It's as if my brain has forgotten how to fall asleep and the longer I lie there, the more anxious I become about not being able to fall asleep and the longer I stay awake. I have even resorted to sleep aids but to no avail. They work only when the brain soldiers let them. Last night it was melatonin but the brain soldiers decided they were having too much fun tormenting me and brushed off the melatonin like it was nothing.

So here is my plea brain soldiers... Cut it out! I'm taking control of my brain back! I want to sleep so for heaven's sake and for the sake of all of co-workers who have to deal with me cranky due to no sleep, GIVE ME BACK MY BRAIN!!!

Eating my way through Phoenix

So I just came back from a short trip to Phoenix with my Aunt to visit my cousin and his family. It was great to escape the horrible NY weather, even if it was just for the weekend. Phoenix is a nice place to visit but it seems like the majority of our time there is spent on eating. So just in case of any of you are planning a trip to Phoenix in the future here is my eating advice...

Famous Daves BBQ... http://www.famousdaves.com/

Atmosphere was definitely what you would expect to find in a chain BBQ place. The clientele, WOW is all I can say. Staff was overwhelmed and the service was mediocre. We asked about the ingredients in one of their side dishes (what kind of cheeses were in the homemade mac and cheese) and not only did the server not know but he had to go through 2 managers to find out! The food came really fast and the ribs were awesome! On a scale of 1-10, I give it a 6.5

Chompies http://www.chompies.com/

They advertise themselves as "Arizona's New York Deli" and I have to tell you, they aren't lying. Their menu is broad and the food lives up to the hype. I had a corned beef sandwich that could rival an New York Deli that i've been to. The service was eh, but lucky for them the food was great! On a scale from 1-10, I give it an 8

Saguaro Grille in Carefree http://www.saguarogrille.com/

I really have nothing to nice to say about this little spot in Carefree, AZ. The staff was uncaring and borderline rude. We waited about 40 minutes for our food to come out with little apology from anyone. Our waitress was clearly overwhelmed (I almost felt sorry for her) and the food was alright but not worth the hassle. On a scale of 1-10, I give it a 3.5

And last but not least....

Sapporo http://www.sapporoscottsdale.com/

This is my FAVORITE place to go whenever I go to Arizona! It's a japanese restaurant with hibachi or regular dining. If you go before 7pm you can partake of their happy hour menu which has some great things. Their sushi is fresh and delicious and the service is great! The atmosphere is trendy and i've never been there when it wasn't crazy crowded. It has a hopping happy hour and seems to be the place to go for a night out. On a scale of 1-10, definitely a 9.5 (cause nothing in this world is perfect)

So there you have it. My eating adventures and recommendations for your next visit to Phoenix. Bon Apetite all!!!

"Live this day as if it will be your last. Remember that you will only find "tomorrow" on the calendars of fools. Forget yesterday's defeats and ignore the problems of tomorrow. This is it. Doomsday. All you have. Make it the best day of your year. The saddest words you can ever utter are, "If I had my life to live over again." Take the baton, now, Run with it! This is your day! Beginning today, treat everyone you meet, friend or foe, loved one or stranger, as if they were going to be dead at midnight. Extend to each person, no matter how trivial the contact, all the care and kindness and understanding and love that you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again." -Og Mandino-

To the friends and family who have been devastated by the loss of loved ones... You are in my thoughts and prayers and your pain and sorrow is not in vain. It has helped me remember some very important things; Hold your loved ones close to your heart, tell them you love them often, love unconditionally, live with no regrets and make each moment into a memory to treasure. Life is too short to hate, too short to be angry, too short to judge or hold grudges. So, to my friends and my family, I love you and I treasure each and every one of you. Thank you for being a part of my life and I hope you will be a part of it for many years to come. If one person who reads this finds as much meaning in this quote as I have, the world will be a better place.

Dear Mother Nature

Dear Mother Nature,

My name is Monkey and I just wanted to write you a quick thank you note for all the AWESOME snow you've given us this winter! My mother is not at all happy about it but I love, love, LOVE it!!! All my mother does is moan and groan "I hate the snow!", "It's too cold!", "Who pissed Mother Nature off!?!"... But I know the truth, no one made you mad, you love the snow just like me! It's so much fun! I love to bounce, and run in it, dig and chase snowballs and I especially like to eat it! It's so fresh and makes everything smell so good, sound so clear... So, keep it coming Mother Nature! And thanks again!

Love Always,

Monkey Simon

*P.S - As Monkey's mother, I thoroughly object to the nature of this letter. Snow is fine when it's one or two storms a season but when it's one or two every week it is unacceptable! So Mother Nature, as much as my boy loves the snow, take pity on us poor saps who have to drive and deal with the effects of the snow. Thank you! -Monkey's Mom-

Reality TV... Can you handle it!?!

Let's talk about reality tv for a minute (as i sit here watching Tabitha's Salon Takeover). I'm an addict, i'm not going to lie. I think that there isn't a day that goes by when I don't watch at least one reality tv program. But why? What's the draw? Why are we obsessed with watching these wannabe celebrities make fools of themselves on national tv? And better yet, what possesses these people to go on tv and expose themselves to ridicule from people all over the world?

Here are some of my favorites reality tv guilty pleasures ...

Jersey Shore (of course)

I don't even know where to start with these cast members. They are a walking stereotype! Guidos and guidettes who are incapable of an in depth thought more than likely due to over inhalation of hair spray and over exposure to fake sunlight via tanning beds. How much can I drink? How many people can I sleep with? and how can I embarrass myself the most on any given day? It's a train wreck of a show but I just can't stop watching!

Real Housewives (Any city)

The only season I have watched is Real Housewives of New York City. It's about all I can handle of this concept, especially after seeing previews for other seasons. It seems to be the most tame season even though the women featured are all self absorbed and slightly crazy. The biggest problem these women have is how to expose themselves the most to the media and increase their credibility as New York's elite. But here's what i'm wondering... Not one of these women is technically a housewife. The women all work, have no problem abandoning their children at the drop of a social invitation and could care less about providing a stable, family oriented home for their families. I CAN"T STOP WATCHING!!!

American Idol

It's a fact, this show has produced some pretty decent talent. It's given us Kelly Clarkson, Daughtry, Carrie Underwood, just to name a few. Millions of people with delusions of their own talent try out every year hoping to make it through and vie for the title of American Idol. Two percent of these people have actual talent, the rest? Well they are poor saps who are begging to be made fun in front of millions of tv viewers. Maybe now that Simon is gone the criticism won't be as harsh but that was the best part of the show!

These are just a few of my reality tv guilty pleasures. I could go on and on as I am certainly a tv junkie but i'll spare you for today. What are some of your reality tv guilty pleasures? I know you have them, don't be shy. I won't judge ;)

Adventures in HDTV

I'm one of those people who tend to resist the latest and greatest. When something is SO popular I avoid it for some reason, doing everything I can to stay as far away as possible. For example, when Harry Potter first came out I absolutely refused to read the books or see any of the movies. It was all the rage and I wanted nothing at all to do with it. One Saturday, there was absolutely nothing at all on TV and so I caved and watched one of the Harry Potter movies. I was instantly hooked! I went out, bought all of the books (that were written at the time) and all of the movies (which were out at the time) and have been a fan ever since. So you think I would have learned my lesson...

HDTV has been out for a while now. I resisted, didn't want to get it. After all, how much better could it really be? TV is TV is TV. Well, I just got me one of those new fangled big screen LED TV's (which I will be paying off until I collect social security) and how could I not convert to HDTV? So I switched over boxes, hooked up my new TV and OH MY GOODNESS!!! This HDTV business is crazy! It's like watching real life! The color is amazingly crisp, the picture is crystal clear... I mean it is so clear you can see the pores on the actors faces! The details that stand out are unbelievable! So what the heck was I thinking waiting so long to convert!?! I think I have definitely learned my lesson and I will now be a slave to the latest rage. Thank you Samsung and Time Warner! You've made this TV addict a very happy girl!!!

Don't judge me

In my life I have been bullied many times. I'm not going to sit here and recount them all for you but know that the effect of that bullying on my psyche and the way I view myself and my life has been profound. I think that we can all admit to having been bullied, and I think that we have, at one point or another been the bullies. It's an unfortunate fact of life that has gotten so out of hand recently. The media has glorified it, social networking has given it a new and more devastating avenue and all over the world we are feeling the effects of the aftermath of bullying. Parents are having to withdraw their children from school because the bullying has gotten to be too much, bullied children are taking matters into their own hands and retaliating violently, and sadly, children and adults are taking their own lives because they are unable to deal with the torture and negativity that bullying can heap on you.

Here is what I would like to say to anyone who is feeling badly about themselves due to bullying... People who bully only do so because they are insecure. There is something, or many things about themselves that they are unhappy about and in order to make themselves feel better, they put you down. What you have to realize though, is that the only way their words, their actions can hurt you, is if you let them. YOU hold the power. YOU decide how you want to feel. When you give away that power, when you let their words hurt you then they've won. It's not easy to do, i'm not going to lie. When you feel buried by the negativity it sometimes feels like there's no way out, no hope. But, and a very big but, there is ALWAYS a way out. It's called tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day. A day when things can be better, different, where you can choose differently and make the choice to not give others the power to hurt you. Today is just a page in a book that is chapters and chapters long. Just because the story is a little hard to get through now doesn't mean that tomorrow it won't have a happy ending. You just have to keep reading and have faith that it will turn around and get better. You have to find the strength within in yourself to stand up and let the world know "I am special, I am strong and say what you will about me but it doesn't matter. I know who I am and you can't hurt me." No one person has the right to judge another. Remember that.

On January 24th through the 28th the 8th annual No Name Calling Week will take place in thousands of schools across the country. The No Name-Calling Week Coalition aims to create safer schools by making bullying, harassment, and name calling unacceptable through public education campaigns that motivate students and educators to take school based action around the problem of name calling and verbal harassment. Please join GLSEN, Barnes and Noble and many other sponsors in helping combat one of the biggest threats to our childrens' well being . For more information on how to get involved and what you can do please visit http://www.nonamecallingweek.org/cgi-bin/iowa/home.html

Thank you for taking time to read my rant.

Where did childhood go?

I had a conversation with a friend today about the craziness that is her life (As opposed to my craziness). She has 2 children, an 11 year old boy and an almost 9 year old girl. Just to give you a little background, I have known this woman for about 16 years now and she is about as close to a sister as I will ever get. We have shared more laughter and tears than you can imagine and I love her and her family dearly. Ok, enough mush onto the real reason why we are here. She proceeded to tell me, in our conversation, about how her children have decided to take up 2 spring sports each, making it virtually impossible to have a free minute EVER! Here is my problem with this...

Children these days, when they are not in the classroom, spend their time being carpooled from activity to activity to activity. From sports, to Girl Scouts, to piano lessons, to blah blah blah. When they finally do have a free minute (which is rare because they still have to do their schoolwork), what do they do? Watch TV or play video games. Where is the imagination? Where is the fun? We used to gather up all of the neighborhood kids and play. We played Tag, Red Rover, jump rope, House, Doctor... Games that we had to use our imaginations, our muscles, our social skills for. When's the last time you saw a kid doing that? When's the last time you saw a group of kids playing outside together for that matter? It's so sad to me that this is what has become of childhood. No wonder there are so many mal-adjusted (is that word?) children in the world today.

So here is my advice... Parents, put away the car keys. Your children will not be any less special if they only play one sport or take up one extra-curricular. Take them to library and instill in them the love of books (a great imagination booster), buy them a hoe and teach them how to garden, take them to the park, do an arts and crafts project together... And children, put down the TV remote, the video game and GO OUTSIDE AND PLAY! Build a snowman, a pillow fort, collect lightening bugs, read a book, write a story, play hopscotch (do kids even know that game anymore?), sell lemonade on your street... Enjoy your childhood while it lasts because life gets way too serious, way too fast.

Meet Monkey

This is my boy, Monkey. He is a 2 and half year old Shih Tzu and the love of my life! I don't have any children and I know it doesn't compare but this little guy totally has me wrapped around his paw. Funny thing is, when I first got him I was a complete mess! I had never had a pet before, nor had I ever been responsible for the health, happiness or well being of anything but myself. My time was my own, If I wanted to spend the entire day vegging on the couch, so be it. If I wanted to go out or go away on vacation, so be it. Now, all of a sudden, here was this new presence in my life demanding my time, my attention and it sent my world into a complete tailspin. I couldn't handle it! I cried every day, I couldn't bond with him.... I thought I was going to have to re-home him. I was asking people at work if they would be able to take him, family... anyone. It was like having post partum depression but over a dog instead of a child. Crazy, right? I don't know exactly when things changed, but thankfully they did and now I can't imagine not having him in my life. He makes me laugh everyday and I love him too too much. So stay tuned... I'm sure this won't be the last you hear of Monkey :)

So it's no secret that i've been somewhat cranky as of late. There are things going on, things that are wreaking havoc on my mind and on my stress levels that have made me this way. I don't want to be cranky, I mean really, Joy is my name. Shouldn't I be "Joyful"? Okay, that was a little too much but I had to go there. So in an effort to "de-crankify" myself (and yes, I know that is not a word) I have decided to think of as many things as I can that make me happy. That way, when I am feeling down or slipping into state of crankiness I can just look at my happy list and snap myself out of it...

Things that make me happy...

My dog Monkey

Family

Pizza

Eggrolls

Muppets

Karma

Glee

Singing in the car at the top of my lungs

Sunshine

A good belly shaking laugh

Baking for friends

Good friends ( and I stress the word GOOD)

Old friends

A good thunderstorm when i'm safe inside

A starry night

The smell of crayons

Disney songs

Sushi

Disney World

Personal letters in the Mail

Dreams that I can remember the details of (as long as they're not scary!)

Beautiful Sunsets

The sound and smell of the ocean

The smell of my Grandmother's chicken soup

Being able to be goofy without being judged

Did I miss any?

Start of something new... Day 1

Getting the ball rolling here on Day 1 of my 30 day blog challenge... Favorite Song. Not a very difficult topic but I suppose why go with depth right away? Keep it simple, get some experience under my belt for before I hit the hard stuff right? So, here it is...

So many songs, so many songs... But I suppose if I had to pick my all time favorite song it would be Follow You, Follow Me by Phil Collins. It's a sappy love song, I know and for those of you know me I'm sure you were expecting something completely different. Sorry to disappoint. I always swore that if I ever got married that it would be my wedding song, but as time rolls on, that doesn't seem to be something I have to worry about. Something about the song though is just so right, speaks to my heart I guess you could say.

Another song, a little more recent you could say, that I would go so far as to say is my favorite of the moment is Firework by Katy Perry. What a powerful and inspiring message she puts out there. Whenever I feel down or badly about myself I just put it on and it makes me feel better, powerful and inspired. It's funny that she goes from a fluff song like California Girls to a song like Firework but I guess that just shows her range and her ability to diversify.

Well, that's it for now. Let's see what tomorrow brings!